24 November, 2011

Savannah High Apple Pie.

Savannah High Apple Pie

I'd never seen a more outrageous-looking pie recipe. And I made it. On purpose.

The recipe comes to you courtesy of the infamous Paula Deen, known in America for her extreme Southern drawl and her unfailing love of butter.

I'd actually been looking for a good salted caramel apple pie recipe. Heavy on the caramel. I'm easy that way. (One time, when I was brokenhearted, I subsisted on almost nothing but caramels and soda crackers for three weeks. I can quit you, baby, but don't make me quit caramels!)

One fine day, while I was sitting here minding my own business, a friend in London--the delectable Jackie Lee who has a magnificent food blog--tweeted a link that went to this outrageously ridiculous recipe by none other than Paula Deen.

The tweet:

“SERIOUSLY PAULA?! Are you kidding me?! http://bit.ly/QZY7N

Since I swapped out the shortening for butter, there was a whopping five-and-a-half sticks of butter in this one pie. I was mortified and fascinated and aghast. The ingredients themselves seemed to carry good flavor notes (you really can't go wrong with apples, caramel, brown sugar, pecans), but the freak of a pie was a mile high and looked like it was fished out of someone's toilet. No really, it did.

I knew right then that I had to make it. Toilet Pie.

After contemplating this for a short time, I got a message from Jackie Lee saying "You know, we owe it to the world to make this pie." Yes. Yes, we do. So, on her side of the pond in London, she makes one, and on my side, I do one, as well. As Jackie Lee states "[We] made this Paula Deen pie so you won't have to!"

The link to the recipe is here. With cool-down times, it really takes more like 3.5 hours than the 1.5 hours stated on her web site. The only adjustments I made to the recipe is that I swapped out shortening with butter, I did not use 24 apples because I did not have a bowl that big (I used 20), and I used three different kinds of apples (Granny Smith, Golden Delicious, and Fuji) instead of one, to get sweet versus tart flavors. Still, my pie was only half as tall as it was supposed to be, so a deep bowl (for inverting) and 24+ apples is recommended if you're going for the "real deal."

But how does this monstrosity taste, you ask? Despite the mess, it was actually pretty tasty. (As Jackie Lee said "The flavour wasn't bad. I'd even go so far as to say that it was pretty damn good.") Indeed. It's very sweet (as you'd expect) and its kind of like a pecan pie and an apple pie had a merger.

Jackie Lee's version is here. Neither of us quite got the height required for the tried-and-true version. For examples on how tall it should look, check out these Google images. Feast your eyes on the world's most ridiculous pie.


After assembling the tower.

Oops. I lost half of my pie innards due to oven gremlins.
(Or more likely, I didn't seal off the fluted edges well enough...)
The finished pie in all of its messy glory
God bless America and its ability to mortify me daily!